You are what you tolerate. 👑
But also... HOW you collaborate. What's your next big Collab? We wanna know!
The Empress is a newsletter for curious midlife women 🗞. If you love it, why not consider supporting it? For less than a coffee a week, you’ll gain access to all of our articles, our book club, journaling prompts, VIP coaching, and live events. To sponsor any number of our newsletters, events, and clubs, simply click here.
Fellow Empresses, how are you?
The other day I was in the airport reading The Shift (as I often do) when I came across a story that floored me. I’m paraphrasing
here, so bear with me:She had been listening to a podcast featuring two women in their twenties dissecting The Substance—you know, that awards-bait film where Demi Moore plays Elisabeth Sparkle, unceremoniously dumped on the scrapheap at 50. The conversation meandered through patriarchy, beauty standards, and the existential dread of aging.
Sam was nodding along, fully embracing her role as the wise elder when one of the hosts casually dropped this bomb:
“I mean, come on, what’s her problem? Shouldn’t she be retired and living in a big house in the country by 50 anyway? Why would she even want to keep going?”
Cue the spittake. Sam stopped, rewound, played it again, and laughed—a sharp, incredulous laugh—after first considering where she might find a wall to punch.
Sure, it was snarky. But Sam wasn’t entirely innocent herself. She admitted that her own twentysomething self had probably said equally patronizing and (let’s face it) economically kookadoo things. Move aside, cock-blockers, and make effing way for us bright young disruptors! Sound familiar?
But this hit differently. It wasn’t just dismissive—it was insidious. Sam was reminded of that sharp Margaret Atwood observation: inside every woman is a man watching a woman. These two supposedly inclusive young women weren’t just writing off older women—they were preemptively dismissing their future selves.
These future selves (women, age 55+) are currently the fastest-growing homeless segment in the country.
And that’s the gut punch, isn’t it? Even among smart, self-proclaimed feminists, the younger female gaze can still be riddled with blind spots. It’s a stark reminder of how far we still have to go.
Here’s the link to the full piece with a fantastic interview by Sam with Neneh Cherry:
This brings me to this month’s journal prompt: collabs.
If you could start with just one type of collaboration opportunity—ideally intergenerational—what would excite you most?
Here are a few ideas to get the juices flowing:
Guest posts
Podcast interviews
Collaborative profiles
Co-written articles or stories
Anthologies
Creative challenges
Live in-person or virtual events
If you’re stuck, pick one. Just one. That’s all it takes to spark something extraordinary.
I’ve been toying with the idea of an Empress CollabStack Registry—an active network and case studies that nurture collaboration between midlife and Gen Z women. Maybe it’s just a journal prompt for now, but that’s how movements begin.
Because here’s the thing: you are what you tolerate—but you can be so much more when you collaborate.
In the meantime, ICYMI, Empress Editions, our new publishing house, which opens for submissions in January, has an Official Women’s Founder Tee. If you should happen to get one, do post a snap of yourself wearing it with a link to this story as we’d be ever so grateful!
Midlife & The Holidays: Ask-a-Therapist with
Ready to tackle the holiday season with a little extra grace and a lot less stress? This weekend I’ll be sitting down for a special Ask-a-Therapist session featuring the fabulous Kimberly Wilson—licensed clinical therapist, author of Midlife Musings, and host of the wildly popular podcast Tranquility du Jour.
We’re diving into the big, messy questions of the season, like:
How do we handle the stress of family dynamics during holiday gatherings? (And no, “more wine” isn’t the only answer.) Bonus tips for recovering perfectionists trying to let go of the need to control everything.
How do we navigate the emotional challenges of aging and shifting family roles? (Empty nesters, this one’s for you—hands up if you’ve been there!)
What’s the secret to managing peri/menopause symptoms, like mood swings or fatigue, during such a demanding season?
How can we approach feelings of family estrangement during the holidays in a way that prioritizes our emotional well-being?
Got a question for Kimberly? We’d love to hear it! Slide into my DMs and let’s get it on the list.
This Q&A session is all about equipping you with practical, compassionate tools to handle the holiday chaos—and maybe even find a little joy along the way. Let’s make this season a little lighter, together. 🌟
OK, stay safe out there.
Yours in Grandeur & Deep Sh*t,
p.s. If you are so inclined, follow us on IG for flash content & upcoming giveaways. We’re at @the.empress.age and we’d love to see you there!
All about the inter-generational wisdom sharing and collaboration. As Gen X with a Gen Z kid and who spends a lot of time with wise elders in women’s circles my intent is to act as the bridge. I am involved in a NPO called Grandmother Collective and my responsibility is gathering the elder stories and using technology to get them seen and heard by the younger generation. I believe if is crucial we don’t lose elder wisdom, cultural practices and traditions.
I’m jaded. I had to figure out so much crap on my own or thru really good books.
Great list of possibilities. I would definitely want to do an interview with my daughter— if she’d be willing.