✨The Empress Questionnaire✨Get to Know Dr. Heather Bartos, MD!✨👑✨
She's the Founder of Menopause Rocks & the Author of the Forthcoming QUICKIES 🔥 Plus, Get Ready for a Serotonin Winter Soak! ❄️ 🛁 ❄️
✨ A vibrant space for midlife women, The Empress now reaches over two million readers through our networks of networks. ✨ From bestselling author Alisa Kennedy Jones. ✨ If you enjoy content about midlife, humor, and agency, I’d love to welcome you as part of our community. ✨ For only $50/year ($4.17 a month!) or $5/month, you’ll gain access to all my articles, Monday columns, book clubs, and virtual events.
Fellow Empresses, How the hell are you?
Recently, we launched a new feature—The Empress Questionnaire—to give greater cultural visibility to midlife women dedicated to the art and science of thriving. We’re excited to see the midlife and peri/menopause conversation changing—from bestselling author Miranda July’s All Fours to this week’s interview with Empress Editions debut author and multi-hyphenate midlife physician, podcaster, reiki practitioner, and founder of Menopause Rocks, Dr. Heather Bartos, MD.
About Heather…
Dr. Heather Bartos is a nationally recognized OB/GYN, menopause specialist, podcaster, author, and speaker. Named one of the nation’s top five menopause experts by Oprah Winfrey and Maria Shriver, she is on a mission to break down the taboos surrounding menopause and sexuality, empowering women to navigate midlife transitions with confidence.
As the leader of the Menopause Rocks and Menopause Works programs, Dr. Bartos is revolutionizing menopause care for individuals and workplaces alike. She also co-founded the nonprofit Institute for Women’s Futures, furthering her commitment to women's health and empowerment.
Dr. Bartos brings a uniquely holistic and personalized approach to healthcare, shaped by her diverse background in public relations, medicine, Reiki practice, and service as a U.S. Navy physician. Her expertise has been featured in Shape, Glamour, Refinery29, and ABC News. Named the “resident gynecologist” for Poosh, she is celebrated for her role in transforming the conversation around aging and menopause. Cosmopolitan magazine calls her a “supremely badass gyno,” spotlighting her profound impact on women’s health advocacy.
About Her Practice and Writing…
“In a nutshell: I aim to help the midlife woman feel seen, heard, and healthy.”
1. What is your idea of perfect midlife happiness?
Peace with who I am at this moment.
2. Which empress, queen, goddess, or mythical figure do you most identify with?
I identify with the Orca: one of the few mammalian species besides humans that go through menopause. They are the MATRIARCHS of their pods, and their job is to protect and educate. And they spend half of their lives in menopause as well!
3. Which living midlife woman do you most admire? (And why?)
I would have said Dame Maggie Smith (but she sadly died before I turned this in). I love any woman over 50 that is disrupting the notion that we are to be grandmotherly or grand miserly. Michelle Yeoh won her first Oscar at 64. Helen Mirren and Angela Bassett look sexier than they did two decades ago. Stevie Nicks still performs (and kills it). Not just entertainers but Suni Williams the 59-year-old astronaut currently sequestered at the International Space Station. Kamala Harris and Michelle Obama—these are women who aren’t sitting it out.
4. What aspect of midlife or the peri/menopausal journey do you most deplore?
That the patriarchy is still pitting us against each other. But we can wise up past that bullshit. There’s a seat for every woman at the table, and we need to help a lot of our sisters find the damn table!
5. What do you most treasure or value about this phase of life?
Because I’m no longer worried about breeding or bleeding, I am free of the constraints of the younger woman. Do I have a few lines on my face? Sure. Are things sagging a bit more? Yep. But for once, I feel complete in my own skin.
6. If you could share one key midlife lesson, hack, or nugget of wisdom, what would it be?
This is the half-time show, ladies. The game is not even close to being over, so let’s reassess, regroup, and get back out there (in comfortable shoes, of course). Oh, and LUBE—LOTS of LUBE. The best lube on the planet for midlife vaginas—hails from our dear friends in the LGBTQ community. It’s called Elbow Grease and it rocks, hands down!
7. What gives you the greatest sense of agency in midlife? (i.e. “Knowing that I can…”)
Knowing that if we are lucky enough to live long enough, we’ll all go through menopause—and that is what binds us together as sisters. It is inevitable so we shouldn’t fear it…we should embrace it.
8. Give us the headline for your Empress Age (one that captures the bold narrative you are rewriting for the latter half of your life)
“TOGETHER, we’re not just surviving. We’re thriving.”
And it certainly shows in Heather’s latest book project:
“For me, Quickies isn’t just a book about sex; it’s a manifesto for unapologetically owning your desires and transforming intimacy in midlife. And if you’ve ever thought midlife marked the end of passion, think again—this book is here to reignite the fire and bring the fun back to intimacy. Because we all need to forge more pathways to joy when we’re in the messy middle.”
Coming this Spring! Join the exclusive wait list for VIP giveaways now!
As if one book weren’t enough, Heather is already hard at work on her second: Spiritual Menopause, which offers a science-meets-soul approach in the ultimate guide to empowered midlife transformation. Coming this fall!
Heather’s Empress Edit!
Crisp Percale Sheets: [These sheets] from Anthropologie are a game-changer! Perfect for hot Texas summers, they're crisp and cool. While I used to be a white-sheet devotee, these colorful patterns have won me over. #Cottagecore vibes all the way!”
Fiber Gummies: [These fiber gummies] taste like gummy bears and actually work. They don’t stick in your teeth so you’re picking out gelatinous Hawaiian punch out of your gumline all day. And yay for gut health! They’re a fun and delicious way to keep things running smoothly. Who knew taking care of your digestive system could be this enjoyable?
Rothy's Lightweight Tote: [This tote] has been my trusty sidekick for five years and counting! Made from recycled plastic bottles, it's machine washable (yes, really!) and still looks brand new. A classic splurge that's been totally worth it—when have I ever stuck with a purse for this long? Her name is Celine and she goes everywhere with me!
Fisher Finery Silk Pillowcases: When I realized that sleeping on silk pillowcase wasn’t an 80s throwback to satin sheets and mirrored ceilings, but actually protected your hair and…ready for it–FACE from wrinkles, I was in. These are 30 momme, which means those little silkworms worked their booties off! I got the super serene light blue, but all the colors are divine. Backstage Pass Intel: I loved this so much, that it scored a spot on my tour bus to the Menopause Society conference! (Yes I travel with my own silk pillowcase… that’s so midlife fab!)
Rose Quartz Eye Mask: The *ultimate* relaxation with this [Rose Quartz Eye Mask]—infused with the crystal power of the divine feminine, it’s cooler on tired eyes than a backstage pass, and yes, it could even double as a rockin’ bikini top (cosplay time, anyone? just sayin’!). At the end of a long day glaring at your computer screen–this is a wee bit of divine magic.
Serotonin Bath Soak: I love the [HigherDOSE Serotonin SOAK] because it’s the ultimate unwinding ritual! These potent magnesium flakes are packed with stress-relief essential oils and apple cider vinegar to help balance serotonin levels and melt away tension. It’s not just a bath—it’s a recharge for muscles, nerves, and mind alike. I mean, your tub may look a little worse for wear afterward (it does clean up fine) but you’ll feel refreshed, relaxed, and ready to take on anything (and a little dab does it).
Dopamine Fishnets: I would never in a million years imagine I would recommend a pair of cheap, [fishnet tights] but SISTER… these are fun and flirty, with just enough stretch so they’re not too tight, but somehow make your midlife legs look amazing. I pop these on with a denim dress or just under a pair of pants and voila, instant fashion at an easy and cheap price–they even look cute wearing Chuck Taylors with them.! The floral pattern is super cute and adds a little edge without trying too hard. Perfect for giving any outfit a bit of a confidence boost!
Chuck Taylors: OK, I’m known for my atypical “doctor shoe” choices. I love me a pair of [Classic Chucks]! And if you’re “fun-sized” like I am… the platform ones are actually super comfortable and bendy but give a good extra inch of height! My patients always see me in these and I feel my Gen X soul soaring when I pop these guys on.
Where readers can find you:
Tik tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drheatherbartos
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drheatherbartos/?hl=en
Linked in: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drheatherbartos/
Website: https://menopauserocks.com
The waitlist for her forthcoming book: https://www.empresseditions.net/
We hope you enjoyed this new feature!
Yours in Grandeur & Deep Sh*t,
ps - I am a human typo. Amnesty appreciated.
*The information contained in this post is intended for informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any illness. Before using any practices or products referenced in this piece or others, always consult your healthcare providers, read all labels, and heed all cautions that come with the products. Information received from this piece, or anywhere in this Substack, should never be used in place of a consultation or advice from a healthcare provider. If you suspect you have any adverse conditions, please consult your healthcare providers immediately. This Substack, including Alisa Jones and any other writers or editors, disclaims any responsibility for any possible adverse effects from the use of any information contained herein. Opinions of any writers in this Substack are their own, and the Substack does not accept responsibility for statements made by writers. This Substack does not make any representations or warranties about a writer’s qualifications or credibility.
Here are some lovely things readers have said recently about this newsletter:
“One of Substack’s funniest voices on midlife, menopause, and showing up for yourself.”
“It's so refreshing to read inspiring, longer-form deep dives after years of swimming in seas of short-form social media.”
“Alisa always brings something extraordinary as a writer and it's forever enlightening to peek into her midlife brain.”
I’d love to see you as part of the community — and I hope you enjoy these pieces above about midlife love, agency, and believing in yourself.
 | A guest post by
|
This sentence: "There’s a seat for every woman at the table, and we need to help a lot of our sisters find the damn table!" I couldn't even find the door to the room with the table before I turned 40; had no idea what was coming my way. Thank goodness for Dr. Bartos; she has been a life-saver. Cannot wait to read her book! 🦋
Heather rules! No grandmotherlies or grand-miserlies in her vision for the grand second half. She’s the voice of authentic power, agency and positivity women need so badly right now, it’s thrilling to see her out there making waves. And I CANNOT WAIT to read her book!